Change
by EleaAnn
Summary: Oneshot. Ziva finally turns to Tony for some comfort. No spoilers, doesn't go with a special episode. Tiva, because I miss them on screen.


**Hi! This is actually my first fanfic ever to be published, soo... I'm a little nervous. I am all into Hurt/Comfort, as you may notice while reading. :) I'm sorry for any mistakes (if there is anything really bad, please tell me! I'm still learning) and I'd like to know what you think! Ok, so here it goes:**

There he was. A casually dressed Tony was sitting on the couch, a half-empty bottle of beer in his hands. He looked different in blue jeans and a thin sweater, staring into the bottle in his hands. Of course he had not heard her entering. So she took the time to study him carefully, trying to make out his current state of mind. He seemed sad, she noticed with surprise, sad and worried. "Tony." She decided to announce her presence and regretted it as soon as she heard her own, pathetic voice. She should have stayed home, this was not a good idea. They could have talked about this tomorrow, when everything would have calmed down. When she would have calmed down. "Ziva. What are you doing here?" he sounded tired, and he didn't look up from his hands. Ziva let out an inaudible sight. Why could he not look at her for just a second? Then she would not have to use that pathetic voice of hers again to explain something she did not quite understand herself.

"Tony." There. She'd said it again. It caused him to look up and it caused his heart to skip a beat. There she was. Ziva David was standing a few feet away and he noticed that she looked gorgeous wearing just jeans and a plain blue shirt, without her boots and her plait, socks and curls replacing the missing elements. Gorgeous, yes. But somehow the silent tears running down her face didn't fit into this picture. He had never seen her cry before, not like this. And she didn't even seem to notice.

"Ziva, you're crying", he stated softly, after his eyes had scanned her up and down. "I know, I…", her hand went up to her cheek, to wipe away the unwanted tracks of tears. He was looking at her, she could see warmth in his eyes, but also something else. Confusion? Expectation? What was she supposed to do now? She had not thought this through, she realized. What the hell was she thinking?

Not wanting to scare her away, Tony didn't move from his seat on the couch. He just sat there, keeping their eyes locked, and hoped that she wouldn't run. "This is about what happened today, isn't it?, he asked softly, trying to block the haunting images from his own mind. Ziva's expression changed from nervous to… frightened? Tony was sure he'd never seen this emotion on her. The tough ninja was gone. Suddenly he realized how small she was without her boots and how soft she looked when her hair was down and curly. Tony moved to place the bottle he was still holding on the table without ever loosing eye contact. Then he sat back on the couch.

What now? Ziva did not now what to do or say, so she just kept standing there, looking at Tony. Hoping that somehow, he would know what to do. "You see, if someone's crying, they usually like some comfort", he started carefully. "Now, I know that I'm not some big teddy bear, but since you're not the average little girl, either… I think I would do. And I can keep a secret just as well." Tony was rambling. He wasn't good with words, not when it got serious, anyways. But Ziva understood. This was her language, too. "Soo… come sit with me for a while?", he gestured towards himself. Deciding to follow the longing for comfort which had brought her there in the first place, Ziva slowly walked towards him.

It was not what he had expected, because instead of just sitting down next to him, Ziva hesitantly climbed into his lap, straddling him in the process. At any other time, he would have found this deeply arousing, no question there. However, her intentions could not have been more innocent when she snuggled herself into his chest. Finding this nothing but lovable, he softly wrapped his arms around her small frame, letting his chin rest on her head. He could tell by her breathing and many small sobs that she was crying, and without really noticing it, he started to murmur soothing words into her ear.

After a while, Ziva realized that Tony was talking to her, telling her over and over that she was okay, that everything was okay and that nothing was going to happen to her. Listening, she let his words and his breathing and the warmth of his body calm her down until her tears stopped flowing and her sobs became less frequent. Then he stopped. She expected him to let go now, once she had stopped crying, but he just stayed the way he was. She sat up just a little, to be able to look at his face. He wore a soft expression, watching her with caring eyes. And then she knew why she had come to him. She needed to be close to him tonight. "I almost died today", she whispered, as if that would explain everything.

For him, it explained everything. Hearing her actually say those words made it even more real and Tony shuddered at the memory. After they had wrapped up that awful case, she had gone home, as she always did. He had expected nothing else from Ziva, because it was how she dealt with things. It was how she dealt with almost being killed. It was not the first time, after all. He had asked her if she was okay, wanting nothing more than to make sure of that himself, albeit always knowing that she wouldn't let anyone get close to her. Not now, not ever. Or so he thought. But something must be different now, for here she was. "He would have killed me", she said, a hint of panic now evident in her eyes. And he could feel the same panic rise up in his chest again. "I know", he whispered back. "Ziva, I know".

Feeling him strengthening his hold around her, she understood that he probably needed this as much as she did. So she let him crush her against his chest, even if it started to hurt, even if it was hard to keep breathing. And when he loosened his hold on her after a while, she almost felt sorry, so she snuggled a little closer and let him stroke her hair and her back until the bent position of her legs became too uncomfortable to bear.

"I can not feel my legs anymore", she finally murmured, reluctant to move out of his embrace. From his deep intake of breath she could tell that he had been dozing off and suddenly she felt guilty. "And you are tired. I am sorry", she stated, already sitting up. "Wait, you don't have to leave", he grabbed her around the waist. "I do not think I could even if I wanted to", Ziva hissed, rubbing her aching legs. "What are you doing?" she squeaked confused as Tony suddenly lifted her up with him as he raised from the couch. "Well, seeing as you said you didn't want to leave, I figured we could get something to eat."

Tony was amused by the way Ziva had slung her arms around his neck in an effort to maintain her position while her legs were dangling at his sides almost limply. He found that she looked sweet when she was embarrassed. "Let me down", she demanded, but didn't let go of his neck. "I don't think those legs of yours would want me to", he joked and started to loosen his grip around her waist to show her. The noise she produced as a reaction was something else he'd never heard from her before and it caused him to chuckle. When he moved his hands to be able to support her better, she sounded almost like her normal self: "Okay, so do not let me down, but if you so much as touch my ass, I will hurt you" Still chuckling, he folded his hands under her aforementioned body part. Watching her shocked expression, he explained: "Doesn't matter whether I let you fall or grab your ass, you're going to hurt me either way. And I liked this option better". That last comment earned him a head slap. Still, he could feel her relax, while her arms remained loosely around his neck. "I could have had plans to torture you less for the first option", she teased back, perceiving his attempt to lighten the mood. Suddenly their eyes met and Ziva noticed for the first time how close they were, how close they had been ever since she had crawled into his lab. Surely Tony was noticing this, too. Just when she was getting uncomfortable, like she always did when something –or someone- was getting too close for her likings, Tony did something unexpected. "I'm glad you're not dead", he said honestly, never averting his eyes. Somehow, for Ziva, this changed everything and it caused her to want to get even closer instead. Tearing up once more, she intensified her hold around his neck and rested her head on his shoulder. "Me, too", she said quietly.

Then he started carrying her through the room, slightly bouncing her up and down in the process. "Tony, what is wrong with you", Ziva asked next to his ear, confusion once more evident in her voice. "It's fun, like carrying a giant baby", he mused, clearly without thinking. Ziva pinched him in the neck, causing him to yelp: "Ow, hey! That hurt!" "Enough is enough, DiNozzo", she said with a stern voice. Suddenly he feared that he'd gone too far, wherever that might be since 'too far' seemed to be moving further away every minute now. Seeing his shocked expression, it was Ziva who was laughing this time. "Oh poor boy, you should see your face", she caressed his cheek with the back of her left hand. "Not funny", Tony pouted, but started walking again. And bouncing again. "What do you want to eat?", he asked innocently when they reached the kitchen. To his surprise, Ziva had not pinched him again. So it had been worth the second try, he thought smilingly. "I am not really hungry", Ziva mumbled from her position on his shoulder. "Did I make you get seasick?" "No, I just… like things the way they are right now", she answered quietly. It was a good thing that he could not see her face which was very likely very red right now. Tony's heart skipped a beat for the second time today. How had they come from not touching and barely sharing anything important to cuddling and admitting so much in just one evening? He tightened his hold on her once more. "Are you sure?" The answer was a nod, which he couldn't see but only feel. He smiled. He would carry her all night if that was what she wanted. "Stop the bumping!", she warned somewhat groggily when he walked back to the living room. "You're tired", he stated. He could tell by the sound of her voice. Ziva, who had already closed her eyes, chose not to answer that. And she chose not to react when she noticed that Tony was gently rocking her as he was walking through the living room and humming what had to be a lullaby. Maybe he needed that after today. And since all she needed after almost dying today was currently carrying her around the living room 'like a giant baby', she did not mind.

**Thank you for reading! :)  
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